The 12 Cyborgs of Christmas
by Kaijo
Summary: A songfic for the holidays, plus a couple of bonus songs for you to sing this holiday season; vote for your favorite! Note that this kinda takes off from my Crisis series, although you should be able to follow the humor even if you haven't read it.


**Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha**

**The 12 Cyborgs of Christmas**

Xx~~*~~xX

It was that time of year again, wherein a certain small (but growing) subsection of Mid-Childa residents had begun celebrating a holiday imported from Earth. At the Nakajima residence in particular, Genya and his family was experiencing something new: As he looked around his house, all of the cyborg sisters had come together for the first time in a long time, to celebrate this special holiday under the same roof. Sein, Otto, and Deed had come over from the church, while Quattro, Tre, and Sette had been released from prison some time ago; Genya was one of the few who knew they now secretly worked for Auris.

[Who could have imagined that when you brought those two girls home that day, Quint, that I'd end up with such a full house,] Genya mused while taking a long drink from his cup, enjoying the smooth flavor his his special holiday eggnog, and then watching as his eldest daughter began to hand out presents.

_On the first day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_A Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

He couldn't help but smile at the girls' expressions as they began to receive their gifts, their faces lightning up in wonderment and joy. His gaze traveled over his second child, and he had to do a double-take because he could swear there were two of them.

_On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

Genya blinked and quickly finished off the rest of his drink, all concerns of inaccurate visions slowly melting away into a warmth of burning goodness emanating from his belly.

"Would you like some more?" Tre offered awkwardly, filling Genya's cup with more eggnog. She appeared to be not quite comfortable with the atmosphere, but was honestly trying to fit in by.

"Y-yes, thank you, um..." he started to say, then paused to rub his eyes.

"Tre," the three women supplied a bit nervously.

_On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

Genya shook his head, wondering if perhaps he put a bit too much of his special sauce into the drink

"Something wrong, father?" a sly Quattro offered, sitting down next to him and taking a long drink as well.

"Since when am I yur father?" Genya countered, his speech slurring a bit, taking another gulp and then blinking several times as he looked at his new couch mate.

"Just teasing," the four of them replied in unison. "But this... what do you call it? Eggnog? It is quite delicious."

_On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"Oh ho ho," Quattro laughed, reaching for the nearby pitcher that Tre had left in order to refill their cups. "Did I do that right? That is the standard holiday laugh, correct?"

"Yesh," Genya answered almost absently, finishing off his nummy cup and offering it to Quattro to refill, but it was only half-filled before the pitcher became empty.

"Oh dear, is there more?" she asked a bit despondently.

Genya's head moved up and down in exageratted motions in what passed for nodding. "Yesh, but itsh in the refrigor... refreger... refryer?"

The #4 cyborg twisted her head to call into the kitchen. "Cinque, would you be a dear and get us some more eggnog from the refrigerator? We're all out!"

"I'll be right there," the five Cinques answered from behind the counter that divided the living room and kitchen as Genya stared in fascination at the multiple identical individuals.

_On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"Moooaarrr," Genya almost groaned as his glass was refilled by the #5 cyborg, and then toasted Quattro before the pair quickly downed their new drinks. They promptly hiccuped in unison and giggled at each other.

"Um, are you okay?" Sein asked, having been studying the Nakajima patriarch. "Too much alcohol isn't good for you; maybe you should slow down?"

Genya smiled gratefully at all six of her. "I can stop aaaaanytiiime."

_On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,_

_Six warning Seins,_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"Is the eggnog really good?" Sette asked, wearing a Santa cap curious as she came over to study the concoction.

"Wonderful!" Quattro nearly cooed, offering her a cup. "You should have some!"

"Fantashtic!" Genya agreed, grabbing the pitcher on his third try and leaning over to fill Sette's glass. "Ready?"

The seven Settes nodded, and Genya felt it was good he had seven arms holding seven pitchers of eggnog to fill all seven cups.

_On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Seven ready Settes_

_Six warning Seins_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

Sette took a sip, then blinked and down the whole cup. "You're right, this concotion is strangely... pleasing. May I have another?"

Genya nodded, eagerly giving her a refill after, then clinked his cup against her in a toast, then took a look across the room where the present unwrapping was taking place.

"Um, thank you," came Otto's somewhat-pleased-yet-mystified voice, lifting her present out of the box.

"Vivio made it for you in one of her classes," Sein clarified, in response to her sister's questioning face. "As thanks for all your help this past year."

Otto's face brightened. "Ah, then I shall treasure it immensely! I'll find a place to hang it when I get home."

Genya squinted and just barely managed to make out the fact that all eight Ottos were holding a mobile, from which several colorful beads and animal shapes hung.

_On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Eight Otto mobiles_

_Seven ready Settes_

_Six warning Seins_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"Oh, wow!" Nove exclaimed excitedly, taking a look at the various objects within her present.

"We all know how much you like merchandise, so we all pitched in and got you various things with the logo," Ginga explained.

Nove reddened slightly, still a bit ashamed her sisters knew how much of a Superman/Supergirl fangirl she was. Still, that didn't stop her from pulling out a shirt that had a cape attached, and then immediately donning it on to strike a pose.

Genya raised his glass in toast to the nine copies of his daughter, then downed it and exhaled happily.

_On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Nine Super Nove's_

_Eight Otto mobiles_

_Seven ready Settes_

_Six warning Seins_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"What is this?" Dieci questioned, lifting the large metal box out.

"That's so you can keep your stuff out of my stuff!" Nove huffed, but despite the somewhat-belligerant tone, there was an undercurrent of sisterly teasing there. "It's got a lot of compartments to keep your knick-nacks secure and in one place."

"I see," Dieci replied, working the combination written in the manual to open the safe.

Genya thought it was nice of Nove to get enough of them for each of her ten sisters.

_On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Ten Dieci safes,_

_Nine Super Nove's_

_Eight Otto mobiles_

_Seven ready Settes_

_Six warning Seins_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

"Oh, and here we are, one for Wendi!" Ginga announced, bringing a beautifully-wrapped present over.

The redhead's eyes lit up as she eagerly accepted it, quickly tearing off the paper.

"Careful, Ginga, you almost lost a finger there," Subaru teased.

"Ha ha," Wendi laughed in a monotone voice, then blinked as she lifted the stuffed animal out and studied it, before giving her hugely grinning sisters a partial glaring look, eyes half-lidded. "Very funny, you guys."

"Aren't you the one who is always looking for huge feet?" Cinque asked innocently, curious.

"That's 'Bigfoot' and he DOES exist; I saw him!" Wendi insisted, then sighed as she took another look at the stuffed human-ape hybrid animal. "Still, it is nice and furry."

"It's not exactly a bigfoot," Subaru explained, mirth hidden in her eyes. "Look at the tag."

She did, as a chorus of laughter greeted her reddening ears. "Ha ha, very funny. A 'Wendigo' doll."

Genya's tears were overflowing at how well his daughters were getting along. "I'm so blessed," he tried to say, except it came out more like: "I'msho blezd."

_On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Eleven Wendigos,_

_Ten Dieci safes,_

_Nine Super Nove's_

_Eight Otto mobiles_

_Seven ready Settes_

_Six warning Seins_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree._

Genya dearly wished the room would stop spinning so he could let go of the couch arm and take another drink.

"Ginga, I dad's about lost it again," Subaru noted, sighing.

The elder sister looked over and matched her sister's expression of exasperation. "Well, he almost made it past 10pm this time. Do you want to take care of him, or shall I?"

Streaks of tears began to flow down Genya's cheeks once more as he began to cry; he had such caring daughters.

"I can do it," Deed offered, standing up.

"Are you sure, Deed?" Ginga questioned.

"I am closer," the other cyborg stated. "And I'd like to do something to help out. What do you need me to do?"

Subaru chuckled. "Just take him to his room and lay him down on his bed so he can sleep it off."

"I cansh doit meshelf," Genya insisted, leaning forward a bit, but then leaning back again. "Shoon ash I ken getup."

"I got you," Deed told him, pulling him to his feet and putting his arm over her shoulder, her cyborg strength easily enough to practically drag him down the hall.

Genya tried to focus on all twelve of the women helping him as the world did somersaults. "Yer cute! How... *hic!* old are you?"

"I suppose I am about 4, chronologically," she replied, opening his bedroom door.

His spirits sank. "I schee."

"But I suppose I am about 19 or 20 biologically," Deed continued thoughtfully.

"Woo!" Genya cheered half-heartily as she laid him down, the dizzying trip making him close his eyes.

As the door closed, he dreamed of twelve identical Deeds tenderly caring to his every need...

_On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love brought to me,_

_Twelve legal Deeds,_

_Eleven Wendigos,_

_Ten Dieci safes,  
_

_Nine Super Nove's_

_Eight Otto mobiles,_

_Seven ready Settes,_

_Six warning Seins,_

_Five kitchen Cinques!_

_Four Quattros,_

_Three serving Tres,_

_Two Subarus,_

_and a Ginga next to the Christmas tree!_

Xx~~*~~xX

Author's notes:

Merry Christmas everyone! Or Feliz Navidad, Mele Kalikimaka, Happy Hanukkah, Krazy Kwanza, or whatever you celebrate! And if you don't, then at least down a bunch of spiked eggnog! Considered doing this from Jail's perspective instead, but I felt Genya getting smashed and seeing multiples made a bit more sense and was a bit more amusing. Some of the puns may not come across so well, though. =( Still, at least I can share Jail's version:

_On the twelfth day of Christmas, mad science brought to me,_

_Twelve Deeds a-slicing,_

_Eleven Wendi's surfing,_

_Ten Dieci blasting,_

_Nine Nove's skating,_

_Eight Otto's shooting,_

_Seven Sette's a-throwing,_

_Six Sein's a-diving_

_Five kitchen Cinque's!_

_Four Quattro's,_

_Three speedy Tre's,_

_Two lying Due's,_

_and an Uno from my genetic tree!_

x~~*~~x

And now, courtesy of Nanoha, a couple of extra songs for you to sing this holiday season:

_Dashing through the sky,_

_preparing to fight a foe,_

_RH says "Standby,"_

_Then emits a soft, pink glow._

_I see a new recruit,_

_A staff forms in my hand,_

_What fun it is to aim and shoot,_

_A spell you can't withstand!_

_Oooohhhh..._

_Friending spells, friending spells, befriending all the way!_

_Oh what fun, it is to shoot, bringin' foes under your sway;_

_Friending spells, friending spells, befriending all the way!_

_Oh what fun, it is to shoot, bringin' foes under your sway._

_I slapped Arisa's cheek,_

_Shot Fate-chan from the sky,_

_showed Vita my technique,_

_A defense program did die._

_I cooled Teana's head,_

_Dieci, Blaster One go!_

_And Quattro wished that she was dead,_

_Then I blasted Vivio!_

_Oooohhhh..._

_Friending spells, friending spells, befriending all the way!_

_Oh what fun, it is to shoot, bringin' foes under your sway;_

_Friending spells, friending spells, befriending all the way!_

_Oh what fun, it is to shoot, bringin' foes under your sway._

x~~*~~x

Fate: (_poking head into the room)_ "Nanoha? What are you singing?"

Nanoha: (_smiles innocently_) "Oh... nothing."

Fate: (_raises eyebrow_) "Right. Well, I'm heading out."

Nanoha: "Have fun!" (_waves, then resumes singing once she's sure Fate is out of earshot_)

x~~*~~x

_Nanoha, the friendly shooter,_

_had a very shiny spell._

_And if you ever saw it,_

_You would wet your pants and yell._

_The gothic loli knight Vita,_

_used to try and get away;_

_She never let poor Nanoha,_

_express what she had to say._

_Then one foggy Christmas eve,_

_Yuuno came to say;_

_"Nanoha with your spell so bright,_

_Won't you shoot Reinforce tonight?"_

_Then how the Cloud Knights loved her!_

_As they shouted out with glee;_

_Nanoha, the friendly shooter,_

_You'll go down in vague yu-ri!_


End file.
